WHEN PETS GO WILD!
The Australian outback; the plains of the Serengeti; the jungles of Peru; all dangerous places filled with dangerous wild animals. Heavy with the scent of death and terror, these environments can take away the life of an unwary traveler in seconds, their flesh torn apart as they scream their last. Nature red in tooth and claw lets loose her most fearsome creatures in these cauldrons of violence.

So now add Clapham, England, to the list of terrifying landscapes. Well, if you are an employee of the Royal Mail. It seems that the management of the UK’s postal service has taken a stand on attacks by wild kittens; more specifically on Illy, the most dangerous pussy on the street.


Following a mauling by the furious feline, a postal worker suffered severe scratches as she popped the post into the letterbox of Ken (65), and Bradley (30) Ridge. She reported the incident to her superiors who acted with speed to inform the Ridges of Illy’s savage attack.

“I am writing to let you know that, on June 6, our postman was attacked by your animal in your premises while delivering mail to your address. Animal attacks are a major cause of injury to Royal Mail staff and so I am writing to seek your co-operation in preventing a repeat of this unfortunate incident. I must advise you that, if any further incidents of this nature are allowed to take place, I shall have no alternative other than to consider suspending the delivery of mail to your home.”

So wrote Mayo Sonubi, a Royal Mail manager and Protector of the Post. Although a hunting party was not suggested at this stage, the Royal Mail records some 5000 animal attacks each year, which is more than the number of shark attacks in the world or people killed on safari. Clearly the UK is a dangerous place to live – especially if you are a postie.

Tourists may want to note that Illy is still at large in Clapham and should avoid the area unless supported by a hunting party, several Land Rovers, and a double-barreled shotgun.